Music

How can one not LOVE music? I can get lost in music for hours and hours.......some for memory purpose, some for the love of a voice, the lyric, the feeling, the beat, the ability to drift away.....worship......I love music.

Some people...........

I am actually the happiest I've been in a while. What is comical to me is that because I happen to be on the heavier side of me weight wise, people ASS U ME that I am depressed, unhappy and unhealthy. Funny-- this is the first whole year I have made it without hospitalizations and or any other medical issues, other than my norm PCOS crap. Which is one of my weight reasons. I happy with my life. Please be happy for me too.

No guilt of life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From life's first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hand
'til He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand

My Redeemer LIVES!!!

I know he rescued my soul
His blood has covered my sin
I believe
I believe

My shame His taken away
My pain is healed in his name
I believe
I believe

I'll raise a banner
'Cause my Lord has conquered the grave

My Redeemer Lives
My Redeemer Lives
My Redeemer Lives
My Redeemer Lives

You Lift my burdens
I'll rise with You
I'm dancing on this mountain top to see your kingdom come

Three Month Mark

It's been three months since Nicole died. Seems like I haven't seen her in years. We all miss her so much. I can still remember the night before the baby came we were all laughing in her hospital room and she was playing music off the computer. This ones for you she says to me as she plays an old rink jam skate song!

Most of us are handling it well, some are beyond words. The ones who are beyond words are, in my opinion, suffering from guilt. If they would forgive themselves for abandoning her when she needed friends I think they could handle her dying better and learn that life isn't forever. Don't leave things unsaid. Don't leave a relationship you want to keep, and if it's beyond your control and you've done all you can to make it right, have peace in that.

I miss you Kole. I miss your laugh!

Blessings-- Laura Story

We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home,
It's not our home

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise

Grief

Grief is a crazy thing. Comes in waves.........It hit me today that I purposely do not watch the calendar from Valentines day on......My sister's birthday was Feb 24...I loathe March. I'm supposed to be celebrating my child's 3rd birthday in March, she died inutero in October 2007........I loathe April I almost died in April and lost the first of three babies........My husband declared the other day he hated Spring. I couldn't agree more. But since we are all currently grieving Nicole, I didn't notice any of those dates. Crazy. Usually I dread them. Next year should be interesting. My new years eve post was: Resolution
Heal.Deal.Dream.Love.Give.Cook. who could ever imagine the HEAL part would be Nicole. Life is crazy.